You Gotta Drink, Skank!!

Reading week of 2006 has come to a close. I made my usual trek out to Fernie, BC for the week. This time was a with a whole different crew that i normally ride with, but i gotta say, i had a WICKED, EXTREME time.

Let's see, how this trip got started. There was a dodgeball tournament that Nate, Troy, Jared, Justin and I played in (Nate and Troy's team won, btw), and we were eating lunch afterwards and someone brought up going on a ski trip during feb break. Nate found the condo for a super awesome deal. So we started rounding up people. Almost everyone plays or has played Ultimate except for Ali and Kaillee. But i'm sure they'll be recruited to play soon enough.

We left on Monday after packing the 4 boys into the Civic and the 6 girls rode in the Subaru and Echo. We had walkie talkies to keep in contact with all 3 vehicles and to pass the time. Traci and I thought they were fun. Nate got grumpy cause we were bugging them too much. The best use for them was when Echo was trying to pass a semi. The first 2 cars had passed and were looking out for traffic. "Go ECHO. GO GO GO." The trip there was pretty uneventful, other than trying to convince Echo to pass and for some throwing of a hard boiled egg. I swear that it did hit the Civic! hahaha. We took a stop in Medicine Hat, after once again getting lost kinda, and picked up about 15 cases Brewhouse and Lucky, among other things. We got to Fernie around supper time. We arrived to a sweet "present" in the freezer. And that is when the drinking began.... and didn't really stop 'til we left! Some people's shotgunning cherries were popped as we did a group shotgun. We played some drinking games, mainly Slap 'em! (What's the name of the Ga-ame? SLAP 'EM! What's the object? GET FUCKED!) Traci and I were awesome at that game. I didn't realise how much beer gets spilled during drinking games until the birth of the infamous BEER TOWEL. After the games were all done, someone decided to hang it up in front of the fireplace fan and waft all that beer-y goodness into the rest of the condo. YUCK!

Our first day, we woke up to bluebird skies and bulletproof groomers. The snow was really fast so that made it fun. The sun warmed up the runs enough during the days that they weren't that icy. We only got a light dusting of snow, if that, over the 3 days we rode. We spent lunches at the hill. The one day i had at $7 burger. It was delicious. JL and Nathan had their special Executive Board meetings on the days they day forgot or chose not to bring their lunch. I wonder if they held hands.

After our first day of riding, we headed back to the condo for some lasagna made with love by Ali's mom. It was delicious. After supper we were all sitting around drinking, I left the room for like 2 seconds and I hear this BANG! I walk back into the room and Nathan is lying flat on his back. Alanna had kicked him in the back of the knees and both his legs had give out, ramming his knees into the side of the kitchen counter and splaying him on his back.

After that little incident, we played some drinking games; Spoons this time. Nate had an unfortunate spooning accident. It even drew blood. We headed to "The Pub" for a couple of drinks and some plugging of the jukebox. After that, we did a little tour of Fernie on our way to The Royal for some Valentine's day festivities. Karla and Justin were both in a dating game. Karla was the girl who got to choose from the 3 boys, one of which was Justin. So, of course, they won and got a gift certificate for The Elevator, one of the nicest restaurants in Fernie. We hung out there for a bit. It was a good time. One of the girls on the dating show was crazy, She was talking about having sex with dead babies in the back of a car, and ripping out the guy's intestines and feeding it to him for their 'romantic' supper. She was a Sick Bitch! - T-roy haha. During the game at some point, the girls were asked what kitchen appliance they would be and why. To this, Ali yelled out "A Microwave! Quick and Easy!" Oh Ali.... haha

We hit up the Griz Bar after riding on day 2. Had some awesome Nachos and beer. We were supposed to go hottubbing at Justin's friend's place, but he forgot to find out their cell phone number or the address of their place. So we headed back to the condo for perogy supper, more drinking games and fun. We broke out the cards and got to playing some Sociables. I don't think i've ever laughed that much. ever.

It all started with a someone pulling the Waterfall card and Karla hesitating on starting to drink. You gotta drink, SKANK! was all that could be heard from J-Dawg. Needless to say, everyone lost it. Some of the other highlights were the rhyme cards: "Ran"...... *silence* - Nate; After Gus was rhymed with Puss (yes, i know. great word selection), Jared's comback: Well i could say Juwanto, it's an African name..."; "San Fransisco" "Crisco" "Minneapolis" ? Traci thought we were playing categories. Which brings us to our next quote, Category card: names for boobies, Traci Grace combined knockers and jugs to come up with Junkers. The rule cards also gave us some difficulties. Such as you have to end each sentence with Skank Ithought of by me. genius right?) And then there was the no swearing, skank. Fuck, skank. oops, i'll drink to that, skank. Sometimes, it was hard to figure out a rule, since the 2 best rules were already in place. Someone suggested no words that begin with T, "What no T-words? like Tits??" - Jared. The funniest thing was, this was probably the funniest part of the trip and Alanna missed it all cause she was either sleeping or showering.
Everone was into doing shots and having a good time. We learned Mike Jones' phone number (281 33-Oh 8004!). Traci took the gold medal that night after she woke up like an animal shivering in a tiny little chair. She took the next day off from snowboarding.

Day 3 of Snowboarding was bloody cold. It was -17 at the top of the hill, I mean Mountain. 'Cause we were actually in the mountains, not just some hill in Saskatchewan! I donned my bandeezy and became La Bandita Del Fernie. It would freeze on the way down the hill and make a nice windproof mask to save my face. Although it kinda hurt when it froze to my nose.

That night, we sent the greatest salesman, who can sell ANYTHING, aka Jared, to go get us a hotel passkey so we could sit in the hottubs and use the waterslide at the Standford Inn. It was a nice way to end a cold day. What we didn't know, was that we could have been in there everyday had we just gone and asked.

Nate cooked up some burgers. Our new neighbours stopped by because they ran out of dish soap. Nate said that they just wanted to check out all the hot girls. We figured that was true. haha We started another game of sociables that night too. Troy was drinking out of a gravy bowl because we ran out of glasses. The girls had a team meeting. I managed to hit Nathan right in the forhead with my pen. Sorry dude. Troy pegged Nate in the mouth with a mini egg too. Nice Aim T-roy. Karla also had a minor allergic reaction, we think. Nate took a cue from Gray's Anatomy and wanted to draw a line on the edge of the redness to see if it was Necrotizing Fasciitis (aka Flesh Eating Disease). It wasn't. Ali freaked out a bit over that... Alanna's clinical examination booklet didn't help either. Nate and I decided that an Advil would probably work best, and it did! She was fine within 20 mins!

After all that ruckus, we headed back to the Royal for their Jam night and to meet up with Donny and Brad, who had just gotten to Fernie that night. It was an awesome night. Our neighbours were buying us shots because Ali reemed'em out about their motives for borrowing the dishsoap. And then, Ali disappeared (AND remembered her Jacket). Apparently, her and one of the paramedics/firemen/police guys had gone back to the condos. When we got back, we found her in the bathroom, trying to clean up her elbow and hip cause she decided to dive into a snowbank because her feet were cold standing. Apparently she was locked out an couldn't get the code for the door to work so she went 'round to the patio to try that door, which was also locked. So then she started punching the door for Kailee to wake up, which she did.

Everyone was pretty rowdy by the end of the night. I beat up Troy. The bouncers were watching. They were cheering for me! At the end of the night, we took 2 cabs home, 'cause you're only allowed 6 ppl/cab and we had 8. While we were waiting outside, the bouncer poked his head out and was like "We can take 5 people!" So i replied, "We were just in there!!" and he let us back in to wait inside without another word. When Traci tried to get her to open the door to the washroom, Ali whispered to her "There's a boy in the shower". And then he came out. Rex? Dryer boy? We're not sure his name. He was met with "WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?" from Justin. Then everyone crowded around and stared at him for a bit, and then all the girls ran upstairs to deal with Ali's bleeding. She didn't know how to get rid of him, so I went downstairs and told him that Ali passed out, you should leave. So he did (he asked if she was ok, before that though, what a nice guy. haha). Well what do you know? (Ali's g-ma). Alison Lackie captured gold that night. Alanna was awarded silver that night for pigging out on the following: one ice cream sandwich, 2 pizza pops, 1 hamburger with cheese, one cinnamon bun, numerous perogies, part of a sausage. I think she has hollow legs. (ok, Ali helped a bit too.) During the goings on upstairs, Justin decided that no one else needed a bed that night, so he made himself a "Princess and the Pea" type bed and piled the air mattress on top of the pull out couch. That didn't last long because both Karla and a bleeding, but bandaged Ali needed to sleep. He wouldn't get up but Nate somehow managed to drag him off.

Friday morning, we packed up and Echo went back to Saskatoon with Karla, Kailee, T-roy, Jared and Ali. JL, Nate, Alanna, Traci and I headed to Calgary for some shopping and to see some friends. We hit up Chinook, The Source on 17th ave and MEC. We found Jason's place with Josh and settled in for a beer or 2 before supper. We went for supper at Earl's Bankers Hall where we met up with my Uncle Peter, cousin Sandra and her boyfriend, Trevor, and Justin Brand and Mark. It was a nice supper and I was stoked to see everyone (even though it wasn't a full HMD reunion). No one was really up for going out after so most of us just headed back to Jason's to watch Wedding Crashers. I fell asleep pretty much right away. I think most people did.

Saturday morning, we packed up the cars for the last time and headed back to Saskatoon, sad that the trip was over but happy to be getting home and into my own bed. We made it home by 6 o'clock so Traci could be on time for work. My parents took me out for supper at East Side Mario's and then i had to play Ultimate that night. I was so tired.

Anyways, that's the end of my story. I didn't realize it was that long until i started typing. In conclusion, I had a really good time. I haven't partied that much ever and I haven't laughed that much in a really long time. Mad Props to all the Fernie Skanks out there. When's the reunion tour?

Pz Skanks.